going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
