So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
