woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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