"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
you have to choose: penises or morals?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
