Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
