girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
