Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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