i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
