To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
