For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize