I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
