dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
