i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
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