Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
