im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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