Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
