Got a toothbrush?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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