he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
