I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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