nut hugger
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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