help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
