Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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