i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
