drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
