Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
