The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize