somebody snuck up and got me drunk
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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