they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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