yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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