the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize