maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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