Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Randomize
