Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
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We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
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He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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