I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
