100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
