Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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