What a fucking waste of an outfit
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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