Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
