Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
