It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
