I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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