But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
The power of my boobs compel you
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
