A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize