It's like a parade of train wrecks.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
