In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
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