Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
