it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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