I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I just found puke in my bra..
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
