He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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