He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
NoShamevember. You game?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
