I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
